Title : Why is a BGG2WL-Fat-Shaming space anti
link : Why is a BGG2WL-Fat-Shaming space anti
Why is a BGG2WL-Fat-Shaming space anti
I realize that the world is very complicated.
I, however, am not.
I intend to make this as simple as it seems.
Over the weekend, I shared a video on my FB page of a gentleman who was conducting a routine incredible ballet. Turning, turning, making incredible and very giddy movements that inspired me to feel that maybe I could give it a shot, too.
was also obviously overweight.
And in the vast majority of women on page all have the essence of why I shared the video with them, one decided Snark him, mocking how the "weight" made him lose his balance in the video instead of seeing how inspiring it was to see him get back up and keep going anyway.
"So, I'm really the only one who realized that her weight almost made him fall?"
replied: "Perhaps the rest of us shrugged, because we know that the dancers fall during their practices all the time," and kept moving.
Except, no. This was not enough.
This ... person decided to launch a tirade about how dancers are not fat , which are in excellent condition , how any dancer whose pregnant state would tell you that "all that extra weight is permanently changing its center of gravity" and to ignore or deny their fat while watching it killed her dance routine was tantamount to "make excuses for a lethal disease that kills more affected sooner rather than later. "
I replied, very simply," goodbye. " I was then banned this person from my Facebook page. Because Nawl.
Before we begin, we will make something clear. Stop comparing obesity with pregnancy. Pregnancy shifts its center of gravity, as they are constantly tilted back to keep his heavy belly ever tipping over him forward . It is 9 months drastic and dramatic change how your body works, it's a very different situation from someone who has had years to get used to a larger body. Weight gain is something other than a handful of circumstances occurs quite proportionally depending on their sex (or hormones you are taking.) Either way, no.
Second, this exchange demonstrates exactly why I'm 100% anti-fat-shame.
If a person decides he wants to set a goal of weight loss, and they ask me for advice on how to achieve this, the first thing I tell them is to find an activity they like and stick with it . Becoming a competitor in it. commit to be better at it . Transform in an interesting and viable contender excellence in his office. Cross training to become stronger and more capable in his office. It part of what you are and what you do. And to approach it that way from day one, regardless of how much you weigh.
What about that person when, in giving his best first day, reminding us by an idiot that "people who do this sport are thin and you do not have?" What about the moral of that person and desire to stay active when their response to a comment by stupid guy is for the enemy to look around, shouting "why all the people who placate this pathology LETHAL and other words multisyllabic to make my much smarter than it is? SOUND BULLSHIT "
what about that person, I just wanted to find a way to be active makes them happy? They will hide. Because that is what makes the shame.
is the same kind of penalty to retire to his pint of ice cream when you realize your cheating spouse you with someone else stereotypically beautiful.
This is the same kind of embarrassment you feel when your mother call you names ... again ... not losing that weight yet.
Makes hidden. It's like touching the fire in the stove for the first time. You realize that it is hot. You decide not to touch it again.
experiencing shame in a place he thought was an understanding and promotion of space makes you decide never to return.
And do not get me wrong, there are people who believe that shame is a motivational tool. I am not one of those people.
had a coach "mu" to me once during an activity because he thought it would make me feel more encouraged to go harder. I literally echo to mourn. I've lost almost 200 pounds, and not one of them was due to someone thinking I had to beg and plead for my fat ass humanity at the foot of a strange idiot. I've never done anything even remotely similar to anyone, either.
people, regardless of size, are human. They have feelings. Be aware of how issues not try to avoid hurting the feelings are discussed: a person tries to understand that support is a better motivator than shame. If I, as a coach, have a plus-size customer or student in my class? I guess what I do? I stand before you let them know if they need any modification to let me know, and then trust them to know or be willing to learn from their bodies- . Because this is how we treat humans. That's the way we teach humans. And that's how we became best coaches and the best students. It is the way both refine our respective offices.
I spent a lot of time listening to women about their bodies, their lives, their stories, talk, and I have heard many women say many terrible things about themselves. The world we live tells people that this is the way they should think and treat themselves when they are not ideal. They should have punished themselves, similar to what is found on a ranch biggest loser bonus points and if they do publicly, so cruel and inhumane until they fit the ideal manner. The vast majority of people and punish them themselves emotionally and, in many cases, nutritionally, starving until they can go out in public without an idiot saying something nasty about their bodies. They punish themselves, suggesting they need an outside person to amass in it for them?
I can not control how people talk about their bodies, or how critical body tells people that are activated differently. I can no quarter close comments on the blog, because I have to be pushed back sometimes, and I am not so arrogant as to believe that answer all the questions one might ask about a given topic so there is no need for anyone to ask anything. For these reasons, I can not say that this space is "positive for your body."
However, I can do what I can to ensure that this is not a place where the fat hatred rests comfortably.
I ensure that those who take the personal decision to change their bodies have information that supports them on a journey to a healthy physical and mental relationship with their bodies, rather than one that confronts his brain against his bodies and leaves them confused as to why they can not win. I can assure you that I contribute resources to help people reach their own conclusions about their goals of his own will. I will not always get it right, but I can assure you hear people pushing back to something I said, and take this into consideration to make me and this space better. I can do what I can to model a body image anti-negative, and show people that self-pity and systems support good result at the most progress shame and self-hatred. And I can pats on the back and shout a 'YAAAAAAAAAAAAAS BISH! " Brooklyn when necessary.
The world is full of nasty, rude, condescending jerks. I do not need to be one, and I have to not give anyone an additional space to be one.
is the person who banned? They followed up our little convo with an e-mail telling me all the reasons why, as which "Earthlings Fat" in "flat earth, people who still believe the earth is flat, people who believe something inaccurate in the face of the overwhelming evidence to the contrary, "I get it? smart! -are ruin the discourse on talk obesity in this country due to 1) cut physical education, 2) concerns over food corporations and their profits, 3) the stagnation of income resulting from the people who work harder for much less money and 4) the fact that obesity can and does have an impact on the quality of life of a person are all more important that rates of "payment" (also known as "feelings" for the uninitiated) of "gorditas".
The four important and necessary conversations that we have. But guess what? I been having those talks in this blog f or seven whole years , and they shall be eight years this July. And not once I had to demean, devalue, debase, disrespect, degrade, or not take into account a single person or feelings or dignity or his humanity. If you can not say the same, then sit back and let the adults talk.
Because, trust me, that could take a piece of paper and scribble a list of all the things I give a damn. His thoughts and feelings about fat people would not be in this list. And if you can not respect that, then you can not respect me, and they are not welcome here.
It's that simple.
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