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Title : Ask Anne Diamond: I do not want to be a father to my son secret couple
link : Ask Anne Diamond: I do not want to be a father to my son secret couple

Ask Anne Diamond: I do not want to be a father to my son secret couple

Dear Anne

My new partner not He told me he had a son from his first marriage, and is now in a stable relationship with me she has started a battle for custody of her son recover from his example.

really do not want to be a father and yet now find I'm trapped in a hostile fight with huge legal bills, and her ex blames me for it. I still love her but I feel so used and this really is not the life I wanted.

says Anne

Your partner should have told her son before she went to live with you. So I understand why one wonders if it has been used to obtain custody. She was wrong, and both have to talk that through, or your resentment will always be there.

But like it or not, you are in a situation that does not create, but must now deal with. If he still loves her and is convinced that she loves you, your next decision should be whether to stay with her -. Which could involve your child be around some of the time

The request has reason she does not have custody?

You have a right to know, because his desire to regain custody may be unrealistic. You are being drawn into a costly and hostile struggle that may be impossible for her fantasy and a nightmare for you. If he did win some rights of residence with his son, who does not have to become a father, but that would have to be tolerant and loving your child. Is it possible to do that?

To summarize, how much you love this woman who has kept in giant secret from you, and you are now pushing in a family dynamic that will not? Your choice is to stand beside her, and help your heart, or leave. The sooner you tell what you want, be fairer for everyone.

Do you have a question for me? Email anne.diamond@sundaymirror.co.uk

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