Title : 4 Reasons Why You Should Remove "Sorry" from your vocabulary
link : 4 Reasons Why You Should Remove "Sorry" from your vocabulary
4 Reasons Why You Should Remove "Sorry" from your vocabulary
As I walk into my boss's office, I welcomed with clickety-clack sounds fingers dancing with ferocity on the computer keys and see a frame laser eyes focused frown staring at the screen.
"Hey Becky, um sorry to bother you, but ..."
I am full boarding the train DC in the middle of rush hour and I have taken on board a frustrated and hurried wave of people. I drop the bag between my feet and reach out and grab the bar above to stabilize myself to begin the long way home. another passenger's hand touches mine. Again, I say sorry.
to say sorry at least 15 times every day, if I am guilty or not. It has become a staple in my vocabulary.
For all my chronicle apologizers, why we do it?
One common theory , which explains quite accurately my overuse of the word "sorry" is that being perceived as unpleasant is so abhorrent- especially women - we need to make us less annoying before speaking up. We also ask forgiveness to show humility and as a way to avoid or end the conflict quickly.
Here are some reasons why you should reconsider when, why and how to say sorry and possibly eliminate it from our full vocabulary:
1. The purpose of an apology is devalues
when we say sorry too easily and too often or when we apologize for things that are clearly not our fault, that are not in our control, or otherwise unworthy apologetically that completely strip away the meaning and the power of a sincere apology.
The bottom line here is saying sorry too may trivialize the act of apology, so the most important have less weight. Beware of false alarms-save it for when you really need, not only in words.
2. devalue ourselves saying sorry so often
Most people equate humbly apologize. We tend to think that a proud person can offend someone on foot and apologetically. An interesting thing happens however, when we say sorry in situations that do not justify that word. We tell people who are better than us. It means that our low self-esteem is low.
There is nothing wrong with being confident is confident that individual is not responsible for the mistake of another person. You are a living being that deserves to be seen as an equal by everyone he meets breathing. Not devalue himself. The next time someone finds that, scrap the apology and instead of sharing a look of understanding. Happens.
3. At this time is used to try to solve situations, but does not resolve conflicts
This is especially true for those of us who do not like confrontation and it will go to any length just to avoid a scene. We will launch quick "sorry" in a position to quell an argument before it begins. And while this is sometimes necessary, sometimes we need to "man" or "put the big girl panties" and work to resolve the conflict in fact.
saying sorry may also be a way to handle a situation. We will use an effort to avoid dealing with a particular topic or having to deal with undesirable behaviors or attributes. How many times have we heard, or even said- "I said I'm sorry, what more do you want from me?" This is a classic way to use a weak (and usually insincere) apologies to fix something without reaching a resolution.
4. At this time in done- makes SAD!
A person who is always apologizing, especially in the workplace, you can see quickly and labeling as an individual sorry. It gives people the impression that you are prone to error, incompetent and a person sorry.
During apologize can really affect your self-esteem and self-perception. It is the law of self-fulfilling prophecy.The more than you say you feel, the more you will believe and eventually become it.
Challenge:
Try not say sorry for a total of 24 hours. That does not mean you should avoid apology if you are at fault. Take responsibility and apologize without using the word sorry.
Here are some words / phrases that can help you in this task:
- "excuse / apology"
- "Thank you"
- "sorry ..."
- "it is unfortunate ..."
- "That's sad,"
- Silence
the 4 reasons why you should remove "sorry" from your vocabulary appeared for the first time in Lifehack .
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